Sullivanisms

From the mind of an almost five year old "genius" in his own mind.

- "Mom, want to know how to make the best wemowaide in the whole world? You just get some of that stuff that's yellow that nasty people like to put on their hot dogs."

"Mustard Sullivan?"

" Yeah, mustard, nasty, anyway, you get a big, HUGE, bucket of water, put ice in it - because wemowaide is gross if its hot. Then, you put the mustard in it, stir a lot, then TADA! The best wemowaide in the whole world."

Let me know if you want to visit his wemowaide stand, I'll get you at the front of the line.

- "Mom, you know what ears are for?"

Ok, you are probably thinking, of course I know what ears are for. I would just say yes, I know if he asked me. But, you don't get to hear the explanations on the obvious like I do everyday, so I bit the bullet and took the bait......

"What are ears for Sullivan?" Are you honestly thinking he is gonna tell me they are for hearing? If you are, you should probably stop now and go read previous Sullivanisms posts.

"Well, you know how sometimes your food gets really dirty because it has a lot of dirt in it? Your ears make it safe to eat that dirty food. They get all of the dirt out of your food so that its safe for your stomach."

"Wow! I never knew that's what ears were for Sullivan!"

"Mom, you do know they make you hear things too, right?

"Ummm, yeah"

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- Daddy, "Sullivan look over there, its a restaurant that looks like a train!"

Sullivan, "Daddy, you are whying frou your teef! There is no restaurant that looks like a train over there!"

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- Yesterday after being up all night with hurting foot girl, I fell asleep while he was awake. I honestly have learned my lesson not to leave him awake with me asleep, but this was a true accident. So, apparently he watched a few shows that I would never let him watch. One of which was Power Rangers. So, I get up, and instead of being a sneaky kid and never telling me, he has to rub it in my face.

"Mom, I have decided I am gonna learn karate and kick all of the bad guys out of our way."

"Sullivan, you know how I feel about fighting, I don't like it one bit."

"Well the power rangers all have really cool kicks they can do and no bad guys mess with them."

"Well buddy, that's all pretend."

"Fine, how do you want me to get rid of the bad guys then mom, get a gun and shoot them all?"

No, Sullivan I do not want you to fight them or shoot them."

"Then what mom, what do you want me to do when I see the bad guys, because I am not strong enough to put them in jail by myself."

"How about you ask God to take care of them?"

"Are you kidding or serious?"

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I told him I was going to take a shower with Sophie since she had peed in her cast and that when we got out I would play a game with him. He comes in a few minutes later....

" Mom, did you tell me that you were gonna take a long shower or a short shower? You better think very hard about your answer before you give it! This is turning out to be a very long shower, and I do not remember you telling me that before you got in!"